Dear girlfriends I may have ever made fun of for having cramps,
All I have to say is: Karma is a bitch. I know this because she’s being a bitch in my uterus right now. Remember when we were in high school and you girls would stay home sick when you had bad cramps and I said, “That is total bullshit” because I never got cramps and just thought you were faking so you could stay home and watch soaps? Yeah – turns out you weren’t. I am a newbie to the cramp thing – they only started within the past three years or so – and am clearly paying for the things I said in the days I was fortunate enough not to get them. So to all the ladies I thought were making shit up, I apologize. I sympathize. Now can we go back to the good old days? Not the ones where we tight-rolled our jeans and crimped our hair (please God, never again) but the ones where I didn’t get cramps? Thank you.
Dear uterus,
I get it. You are teaching me a lesson. Lesson learned. Enough with the cramps already.
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2 comments:
I had the exact opposite: cramps in the early years, nada now.
Four Advil usually did the trick for me.
That karma is a hateful bitch sometimes.
Midol. You must get Midol. It has muscle relaxers. Yay for muscle relaxers! Also, I'm with WM - four liqui-gels of ibuprofen usually do the trick for me. And I have had the crampers my whole entire period life. From age 10 until now. YAY. LOVE BEING GIRL.
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